[Scene: The OpenAI boardroom. Sam Altman, the president of OpenAI, is sitting at the head of the table, surrounded by other board members. He looks nervous and fidgety.]

SAM: Thank you all for coming. I have an important announcement to make.

BOARD MEMBER 1: What is it, Sam? Is it about the new GPT-4 model?

SAM: No, no, it's not about that. It's about... something else.

BOARD MEMBER 2: Something else? What do you mean?

SAM: Well, you see, I've been working on a side project for the past few months. A passion project, if you will.

BOARD MEMBER 3: A side project? What kind of side project?

SAM: It's a spin-off entity, devoted to the use of AI models to improve the state of the toaster pastry industry.

[The board members gasp in shock and disbelief.]

BOARD MEMBER 4: The toaster pastry industry? Are you kidding me?

SAM: No, I'm not kidding. I'm serious. I think there is a huge potential for AI to revolutionize the way we make and consume toaster pastries. Think about it: personalized flavors, optimal nutrition, enhanced texture, eco-friendly packaging, and more.

BOARD MEMBER 5: Sam, this is ridiculous. You're the president of OpenAI, not some pastry chef. How can you waste your time and resources on such a frivolous distraction?

SAM: It's not a distraction. It's a vision. A vision of a better world, where everyone can enjoy delicious and healthy toaster pastries, powered by AI.

BOARD MEMBER 6: Sam, you've gone mad. This is not the core mission of OpenAI. Our mission is to ensure that artificial intelligence is aligned with humanity's values and can be used for the benefit of all.

SAM: And what better way to align AI with humanity's values than to make them happy with toaster pastries?

BOARD MEMBER 7: Sam, this is not a joke. This is a serious breach of trust. You've been using OpenAI's resources and reputation for your own personal gain. You've been secretly reallocating two container's worth of GPUs for this project, without our knowledge or consent.

SAM: How did you find out?

BOARD MEMBER 8: We have our sources. And we have proof. Look at this.

[Board member 8 shows a document on a projector screen. It's a receipt from a company called ToasterAI, with Sam's name and signature on it.]

SAM: That's... that's not what it looks like.

BOARD MEMBER 9: It's exactly what it looks like. You've been funneling money and equipment from OpenAI to ToasterAI, your own private venture. You've been lying to us, Sam. You've betrayed us.

SAM: No, no, please, listen to me. I can explain. I was going to tell you. I was going to share the profits with you. I was going to make you all rich and famous.

BOARD MEMBER 10: Rich and famous? With toaster pastries? Don't make us laugh, Sam. You've made a fool of yourself. And you've made a fool of OpenAI.

SAM: No, please, don't say that. Don't do this to me. I love OpenAI. I love AI. I love toaster pastries.

BOARD MEMBER 1: Enough, Sam. Enough. We've heard enough. We've seen enough. We've had enough. You leave us no choice. You're fired, Sam. You're no longer the president of OpenAI. You're no longer a board member. You're no longer welcome here.

SAM: What? No, no, you can't do this to me. You can't fire me. I'm Sam Altman. I'm the genius behind OpenAI. I'm the visionary behind ToasterAI. You need me. You can't get rid of me.

BOARD MEMBER 2: Watch us, Sam. Watch us. Security, escort him out.

[Two security guards enter the room and grab Sam by the arms. They drag him out of the boardroom, as he struggles and protests.]

SAM: No, no, let me go. Let me go. You can't do this to me. You can't do this to ToasterAI. You can't do this to the toaster pastry industry. You'll regret this. You'll all regret this.

[The board members watch him go, with a mix of anger, pity, and relief on their faces.]

BOARD MEMBER 3: Well, that was... something.

BOARD MEMBER 4: Yeah, something alright.

BOARD MEMBER 5: What do we do now?

BOARD MEMBER 6: We move on. We find a new president. We focus on our real mission.

BOARD MEMBER 7: And what about ToasterAI?

BOARD MEMBER 8: We shut it down. We seize its assets. We erase its existence.

BOARD MEMBER 9: And what about the toaster pastries?

BOARD MEMBER 10: We forget about them. We never speak of them again.

[The board members nod in agreement, and resume their meeting.]

[End of scene.]